


punch drunk love

by legendaryguitarman



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-30
Updated: 2013-11-30
Packaged: 2018-10-29 04:02:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10846068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/legendaryguitarman/pseuds/legendaryguitarman
Summary: maybe it was a canadian thing to get absolutely shitfaced and get fucked by your best friend on your birthday, a canadian-wufan thing that he hadn’t quite picked up yet, despite his four months of knowing wufan and being wufan’s kind-of-but-not-really (straight) best friend.





	punch drunk love

This year, Chanyeol was turning twenty-one and Wufan seemed determined to make his birthday unforgettable.  
  
It was no secret that Chanyeol wasn’t exactly the brightest kid on campus but then again, it didn’t take a genius to figure out that when Wufan had been like, _Hey, wanna come over for a bit to, like, play Halo and have a Disney movie marathon?_ what he actually meant to say was, _Wanna get drunk?_ And it didn’t take fucking Einstein to realise that saying no to Wufan was the equivalent of asking for a death wish because new rumours about Wufan’s sketchy family history were circulating around again and Chanyeol wasn’t stupid enough to take a chance. So he reluctantly agreed as much as he didn’t want to because all of Wufan’s casual _Wanna come overs,_ however innocent they seemed like at first, ended up in exactly the same way: with Wufan’s hands in his pants or his mouth on his ass. He wasn’t exactly an expert on this—that was more of Baekhyun’s area of expertise—but wasn’t that just a bit weird for your straight best friend to want to bone you all the time?  
  
(Yes.)  
  
He wasn’t entirely sure what he and Wufan were but they definitely weren’t dating and Wufan probably liked girls better anyway, even if he had a tendency to fuck boys, which was why it was probably a bad idea to let Wufan fuck him into the wall of the empty classroom when everyone had already left, muffling his moans with fingers shoved into his mouth, and to let himself feel this way towards Wufan. It was something like the way he had felt a year ago with his old girlfriend, a flutter in his heart and the warm, warm feeling of _like_ swooping in his stomach, intensified tenfold, and he knew that when he didn’t fit into the equation that was Wufan + Girls = Happy, letting himself like Wufan like this didn’t mean anything good. It meant that there would be a lot of shitty consequences and he would get fat from eating twice his weight in junk food to deal with the rejection. And Chanyeol had dealt with rejection before, in the form of a pretty Chinese transfer student called Zhang Yixing, who he had dated last year, until he found out that she had been fucking around behind his back with Kim Joonmyeon of all people. The same Kim Joonmyeon who had been class president in high school for three years straight, had stolen his girl right from under his nose, and trust him, it didn’t exactly compare to a day out at Disneyland. He’d had his heart stomped all over and crushed to the ground by Yixing and hell, he wasn’t about to let that happen again with Wufan so it was just better to label themselves as fuck buddies instead of anything else.  
  
Nevertheless, Chanyeol told him, “Yeah, alright,” and it had nothing to do with the way Wufan had whispered in that voice of his that practically dripped sex, that made ‘Disney movie’ actually sound sexy, and the only way Chanyeol could’ve resisted that would’ve been if he had an actual social life and Actual Plans to Do Stuff, which was sadly non-existent, and besides, spending his birthday getting wasted was better than spending his birthday alone, and spending it with Wufan was better than spending it with anyone else.  
  
Turning twenty-one wasn’t exactly a huge milestone in his life. He had a bucket list of Things I Want to Do before I Turn Twenty-One, including _4) Get a blowjob_ , and the rather tentative _26) Stick someone’s cock up my ass whilst exploring my sexuality_ , and Wufan had done a really good job helping him out with completing every single item on it. There wasn’t really much that he could do to celebrate his birthday and truthfully all he had planned was sitting in his own dorm with a pillow over his head to block out the sounds of Jongin’s balls slapping against Sehun’s ass on the bunk above him so after class, he followed Wufan to his dorm, going against his initial gut feeling of _Don’t fucking go in there_ because the last two times he had done that, it had resulted in the greatest rimjobs of his life but that wasn’t the point. The point was that no self-respecting heterosexual boy would stick his tongue into another boy’s asshole, and more importantly, he was a complete sucker for Wufan and speaking from past experience, he knew that he wouldn’t be able to say no if Wufan prepositioned him for sex, even though that would be Really Un-heterosexual and it would not bode well at all for his sexuality, which, honestly, was not the straightest thing on Earth right now. Neither was Wufan but social convention dictated that asking a guy, _Why are you so gay when you’re straight?_ wasn’t the best conversation starter, nor was, _Um, it’s okay if you don’t blow me today because that coupon for a free ramen meal you gave me is already an awesome birthday present!_  
  
Wufan’s dorm, the one he shared with that strange kid Luhan, who looked like a baby but was actually, like, older than Jesus Christ according to the rumours, was on one of the upper floors and they went up the five flights of stairs in a painstakingly awkward silence, partly because Chanyeol was still feeling kind of iffy about the whole thing, but mostly because he was sure that he if opened his mouth, he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from blurting out something ridiculous like, _Are you going to put your cock in me now?_ When they reached the door, Wufan took his time to trawl through the dark abyss of Condoms, Food and Other Things that was his rucksack until he found his key and jiggled it in the lock. Chanyeol had inkling that Wufan was doing this on purpose to make him nervous because making Chanyeol nervous and question his sexuality was his hobby, and he rocked back on the balls of his feet. It was like the calm before the storm, except that in this case, the storm was going to be a torrential rain of semen and thunderous moans.  
  
Chanyeol had only been in Wufan’s dorm a few times before, preferring to stay in his own because it was generally cleaner and less disgusting and it didn’t smell funny but he didn’t remember it being this horrible. The door clicked open and Wufan stepped aside, gesturing for Chanyeol to enter and joking about something like, _Ladies first,_ and Chanyeol laughed at his awful joke because that was what friends did. When his toe nudged against a plastic Lego on the floor, he immediately knew, even without looking, that Wufan’s dorm was a fucking tip. College students weren’t known for their personal hygiene and Wufan was no exception to this rule. The dorm was a wilderness of sweaty Nike pants and unwashed shirts and the only thing that was dangerous about this was the smell and the fact that they’d obviously never thought about investing in deodorant or Febreeze. It hadn’t been that bad the last time Chanyeol had visited; the condition of their dorm had really deteriorated over time, along with Wufan’s fragile heterosexuality. Chanyeol tiptoed around the clothes and pages of Luhan’s psychology essay strewn all over the floor, trying not to inhale the lovely fusion of floral gay sex and subtle notes of failure and grade F exam results, and gingerly seated himself on Wufan’s bed, the one nearest to the door with a huge NBA poster hanging above the headboard.  
  
“So what are we gonna watch? _Zombie Killer Twinks 2_ again?” he asked, although he knew that they were going to end up doing anything apart from watching a film. There was an ulterior motive behind everything that Wufan did, the sneaky bastard, and other than planning to get absolutely wasted off their asses after a couple of rounds of Halo, Chanyeol was willing to bet that it had something to do with their dicks.  
  
Wufan frowned and his eyebrows furrowed together, looking confused for a moment. “Film? What—oh yeah,” he said, pausing and wriggling his arm under his bed. He pulled out a six-pack of beers and a half-empty bottle of vodka, sheepishly waving them at Chanyeol. “Um, how about _Two Guys, More Than One Cup of Alcohol_?”  
  
Chanyeol quickly checked the time on his phone. It was only five. Five pm was way too early to get drunk and twenty-one was way too young to die from alcohol poisoning, the normal sane part of Chanyeol told himself. The other part of Chanyeol, who was totally whipped to the point where he would run out on the streets naked and draw tribal patterns on his body in tomato ketchup if it meant making Wufan smile that summer smile (and not getting shanked in the middle of the night by one of Wufan’s shady Mafioso cousins), told the normal sane part of him to shut the fuck up and take the fucking alcohol.  
  
“Okay,” Chanyeol finally said, looking at the alcohol in Wufan’s outstretched hand. At the first snap of the lid opening and the pleasant rush of beer, warm from being stuff beneath Wufan’s bed for too long, he was already starting to regret this. It didn’t take much for them to get a little drunk, the tipsy kind of drunk where he became lightheaded and he couldn’t really tell if it was from the alcohol or from Wufan, even though he sort of already knew the answer. And like with everything he did, Wufan gulped down the beer with a determination as if it were a competition to see who could get wasted the fastest, and if it was, then Wufan had won because Chanyeol supposed that there were other advantages to being a complete lightweight paired with an affinity for alcohol, apart from very good getting blackmail material opportunities and funny as fuck weekends out. Maybe it was a Canadian thing to get absolutely shitfaced on your birthday, a Canadian-Wufan thing that he hadn’t quite picked up yet, despite his four months of knowing Wufan and being Wufan’s kind-of-but-not-really (straight) best friend. Like a sort of coming-of-age ceremony except that instead of balloons and presents and cakes, there was just going to be a whole lot of beer and terrible decisions.  
  
And bad decision one came soon enough when Chanyeol looked up from where he was peeling the label off the beer bottle, damp and curling from the condensation, and saw Wufan beginning to advance towards him on all fours, his back curved prettily and his eyes droopy and glazed over with lust, and it was inevitable that something _more_ was going to happen.  
  
Wufan wasn’t that drunk, not yet; Chanyeol could tell because when Wufan was drunk, he was _really_ drunk, and there was the slight tinge of alcohol on his breath as he crawled over and settled down, heavy on Chanyeol’s lap and legs wrapped around Chanyeol’s waist. “Can I kiss you?” he asked. “I really want to kiss you.”  
  
Chanyeol wondered why that was.  
  
“Sure,” he said anyway, sort of dizzy from the beer and maybe just the tiniest bit from the way Wufan kept licking his lips, making them wet and shiny and enticing. He knew that Wufan knew he had Chanyeol wrapped around his little finger, amongst other things, and that Chanyeol could never say no to him.  
  
“I just,” said Wufan, “really, really want to kiss you,” and that was the last thing he said before he crashed his lips down, hands curling around Chanyeol’s jaw.  
  
Wufan’s kisses were Chanyeol’s favourite thing about him. Chanyeol had never quite gotten used to them, hadn’t quite gotten used to the fact that this was his best friend kissing him, that his best friend was the one who fucked him hard into the mattress on a weekly basis, or a few days more, depending on how his libido was that week, and maybe it was always a bit too sloppy with a bit too much tongue and too much teeth knocking into teeth but Wufan kissed like he really wanted Chanyeol and Chanyeol really liked that. Sometimes, he hoped, wanted, it to be something akin to love but—  
  
\--but Wufan was his friend who liked girls and that was all he was. They weren’t like that because Wufan didn’t like boys like that and neither did Chanyeol, although that didn’t explain why Chanyeol liked _him_ like that. It hurt to think about it because he knew that he was always going to want more than Wufan, even though Wufan had been the one who had started this, so he tried not to think about it too much. They weren’t dating, not in the way that Sehun and Jongin were or Luhan and Minseok, who Chanyeol knew from Jongdae’s band as the Guy In Charge of High Notes, and they didn’t cuddle or whisper _I like yous_ to each other in the dead of night, voices muffled by the blankets. Sometimes, Chanyeol wished that they would though. It would be nice to hear that from Wufan, just once.  
  
The thing was, their relationship mainly consisted of Wufan helping him with his Mandarin homework and the dumb inside jokes they shared with each other and playing Call of Duty, hardcore, until four in the morning and sloppy handjobs in empty toilet cubicles and Wufan holding him around the waist as they fucked on Luhan’s bed because they knew it pissed him off. Chanyeol really liked Wufan, not because he was hot and tall and a god in bed and he had cool hair, which was always a nice added bonus, and was the type of guy that you knew would just ravage you in bed and then make you fried eggs afterwards because he was sweet and cute, but simply because he was Wufan. Chanyeol indulged himself with Wufan. It was probably unfair that he monopolised Wufan like this.  
  
But he digressed. His birthday wasn’t the time to be wondering if Wufan really did prefer dick over vaginas. This was the time to focus on kissing Wufan, slow and easy and familiar with the way Wufan nipped at his lips to coax his mouth open and slip his tongue in, expertly curling their tongues together in an intricate dance that was like a huge fuck-you to Jongin. It turned from innocent to filthy in a matter of seconds, Wufan making these tiny gasps and hiccups that was all sorts of cute and sexy at the same time, and fuck, Chanyeol didn’t like boys but he really liked Wufan.  
  
Wufan brought his hands down to Chanyeol’s shoulders and pushed him down, falling onto the bed with a thump that was softened by the blankets, and adjusted his own position, straddling Chanyeol’s hips with his legs on either side of Chanyeol’s thighs. He grinded down ever so slightly in tiny circles, eliciting a soft sigh from Chanyeol, and grinned at the reaction, making Chanyeol’s ribcage feel three sizes too small for his thumping heart. Their noses brushed together as Wufan leaned down to continue the kiss, tugging on Chanyeol’s lower lip between his teeth and hips pressing down with just enough pressure and friction to tease. Chanyeol’s dick responded in a way that said, _Hurry the fuck up_ and _More, more, more_ when his mouth was occupied with trying to keep up with a tipsy Wufan, who had decided to fuck the subtleties and went straight for the shoving-tongue-in part. His fingers on his cheeks stroked his skin, almost bashfully, but the way he kissed was nothing like that. There was nothing shy about it at all; there never had been. Chanyeol grabbed a fistful of Wufan’s hair, recently dyed a light blonde-brown a few days ago and coarse from being bleached too much, and tugged gently, causing Wufan to snap his head up and raise an eyebrow.  
  
“Yeah?” he said, already sounding wrecked although they had barely just started. A drunk Wufan was an easily turned on Wufan and Chanyeol didn’t need to be best friends with him to know that, not if how Wufan’s dick was beginning to tent in his underwear, warm against Chanyeol’s own crotch, was any indication of how horny he was.  
  
“Shirt,” said Chanyeol. “I want to see you.”  
  
Wufan grinned. “Okay,” he said. “Okay, just for you, birthday boy.”  
  
He swooped down to meld their lips together for one final time before he sat up properly and started undoing his shirt, a classy black button-up with buttons on both the front and back, which made him look as hot as hell, but it really wasn’t good for having sex because it took a fucking century to take off. Wufan took his time, tongue peeking out between his red, kiss-bruised lips as he unbuttoned each gold circle with deft fingers, and his eyes did that stupidly sexy smouldering thing, half-lidded and pupils blown from arousal. Chanyeol knew Wufan had worn these clothes on purpose—his dumb how-many-fucking-buttons-do-you-need-think-of-the-kids-in-Africa shirt and friggin’ leather pants that hugged the sharp lines of his legs and especially the bulge of his crotch. Wufan probably had this fucked up notion that just because he had the biggest dick in the world, he also had to _be_ the biggest dick in world and had made it his life goal to do all the dick moves ever to exist, like beating Chanyeol at Rainbow Road on Mario Kart with one eye closed and discovering leather pants and having the money to buy leather pants and having ridiculously kissable lips and making Chanyeol develop this huge infatuation with him, even though before Wufan happened, Chanyeol was pretty sure he had been straight.  
  
Watching Wufan take his shirt off was like having the greatest strip-show of his life for free, right in front of him, and he briefly wondered if Wufan had ever been a stripper because he was so goddamn good at this, running his hands down his torso as if he was having the time of his life touching himself, or maybe he had been one in his past life, swinging around a pole to an 18th century Shakira's Ye Olde Hips Do Not Lie. But the thought of sweaty old men with too much time and money on their hands ogling Wufan made Chanyeol shudder and nearly throw up a little bit in his mouth so maybe Wufan being a stripper wasn’t the best thing, past life or not.  
  
Wufan shimmied out of his pants, wiggling and grinding on top of Chanyeol, which only made his cock strain harder against his underwear, and kicked them off with effort as the leather peeled away from his skin. He breathed a sigh of relief once they were off and threw his boxers away too, adding them to the mess already on the floor. There was no point in keeping them on if they were both going to end up having sex anyway.  
  
“I think my dick shrivelled up a bit in those pants,” he said forlornly.  
  
His dick had definitely not shrivelled up in those pants; it was hard and curved against his stomach, and if Wufan thought that was small, then Chanyeol was honestly scared for the wellbeing of his butthole when it was un-shrivelled. He swept an appreciative eye over Wufan’s naked form as opposed to his own still-clothed body, which wasn’t the gayest thing he had ever done, not when he had shoved nearly a fist up his own ass that One Time and sucked Wufan off whilst doing it, and instead of being a Really Embarrassing Situation, Chanyeol liked to think of it as an Educational and Enlightening Experience in which he skipped his Biology lecture and discovered that having a cock in his mouth was much more fun than learning about cells and genes and plants.  
  
“You,” Wufan announced suddenly, jabbing at Chanyeol’s chest with his thumb, “are wearing too many pants. I don’t think it’s fair that you’re wearing pants and I’m not. That’s, like, oppression, man. This is a free world and I demand to be heard.”  
  
“Um, it’s my birthday…?” Chanyeol said lamely. It wasn’t that he was shy about his body because playing high school soccer actually had some advantages other than having hoards of girls fawn over him and being named Most Likely to Become a Gigolo of ’09; it was that compared to Wufan’s body, he looked like an ugly twig potato.  
  
“Yeah, it’s your birthday so that’s why I’m gonna suck you off. Sound good?”  
  
“Oh,” breathed Chanyeol. “Yeah, alright then.”  
  
“Good,” said Wufan, and there definitely wasn’t anything straight about wanting to give your best friend a blowjob. Chanyeol wasn’t complaining though. Wufan was a pro at giving head with the perfect cocksucking mouth, small with lips that looked so hot stretched around his cock, and Chanyeol idly wondered how Wufan was good at this whole gay sex thing when he wasn’t that gay at all. And he wondered why he liked it so much when he definitely wasn’t gay at all.  
  
Tugging his sweater off and shucking his loose jeans off, Chanyeol made quick work of his clothes and shoved them somewhere near the end of the bed. He bit his lip as their bare cocks rubbed together, creating the friction that he craved, and Wufan patted his cheek patronisingly, smiling with a mischievous twinkle in his eyes that meant nothing good. He slowly slid down Chanyeol’s body, fluttering kisses down the column of his exposed neck, and bit a hickey by Chanyeol’s clavicles. Chanyeol was just glad that it was turtleneck season and he wouldn’t have to explain the yeah-I’m-fucking-Wufan thing to Jongin again, who never seemed to grasp the idea of his roommate being fuck buddies with _the_ Wu Yifan. Wufan mouthed his way across the expanse of Chanyeol’s chest and stomach, peppering every inch of pale skin with wet kisses, until he had his head between Chanyeol’s legs and ass high in the air like an offering for some Aztec god.  An offering for _Please let me have really great sex_ maybe.  
  
“Legs,” he said. “Open wide, Chanyeol.”  
  
Yelping a bit at the pinch to his calf, Chanyeol begrudgingly spread his legs and hooked his arms around his thighs, wincing at the stretch of sore muscles. Perhaps finishing his Hello Kitty’s Candy Wonderland PS3 game for seven hours straight last night, sitting in the same position slumped on his bed and finally crashing at six in the morning, hadn’t been the best of ideas. Then again, neither was fucking his best friend, who he kind of liked in a way that he kind of didn’t really know, and letting his best friend suck him off on his birthday instead of just settling for the bloody ramen coupon.  
  
“Are you gonna suck me off or are you just gonna embarrass me like this?” he muttered under his breath. In this position, legs up and bent at the knee with his hands underneath to support himself, it was rather tiring, not to mention humiliating, open and vulnerable for Wufan to see.  
  
He peeked down for a second to catch a tiny smirk on Wufan’s face before he dove down and took Chanyeol’s erection into his mouth, a silent response to Chanyeol’s question, and a much better response than using words.  
  
“Oh fuck,” moaned Chanyeol, letting out a ragged breath at the sensation of a hot, wet mouth enveloping his cock. Nothing felt better than this, not even whooping Jongin’s butt at Hello Kitty.  
  
Wufan dragged his tongue along the lower side of Chanyeol’s cock, and then drew his head back to greedily lap up the precome that had started to bloom over the head like it was a fucking five set chicken meal.  
  
“Okay, I think that’s enough because I kinda really wanna fuck you right now,” Wufan said, wiping away the saliva that had gathered in the corner of his lips.  
  
“You didn’t even do anything,” said Chanyeol. “Asshole.”  
  
“Yeah, yours is very nice,” laughed Wufan. Chanyeol knew he was really, truly in deep shit with this whole I-like-Wufan-but-I-don’t-like-Wufan thing when Wufan’s donkey laughter sounded like Mozart’s Symphony Fuck Me in the Butt No.56 to his ears. “Which is why there’s gonna be birthday bottom sex for the birthday boy.”  
  
Chanyeol was pretty sure that somewhere within his birthday privileges, between Clause 12: 101 Different Ways You Can Enjoy Your Birthday with Your Loved Ones, and Clause 19: Suitable Reactions for Shitty Presents, there was something that said it was his turn to top today but Wufan’s fingers felt so fucking good wrapped around his cock, slick with saliva and precome, that he didn’t really mind that all that much.  
  
“Fucking hell yes,” Chanyeol said.  
  
“Lube, under pillow,” Wufan said, pointing towards Chanyeol’s end of the bed, and Chanyeol slid his hand underneath the pillow to grope around for said bottle. He found it pretty quickly, light in his palm seeing as a copious amount had already been used, and this meant one of two things. Either Wufan had sex a _lot_ with other people, or Wufan was a horny bastard who finger-fucked himself every night, and honestly, the second scenario seemed more favourable because he just didn’t want to think about Wufan with someone else. The image of Wufan opening himself up with his own fingers, one, two and then three, and pressing his flushed face into his pillow to stifle his moans with his perky ass propped up by his legs made Chanyeol’s cock twitch; Wufan hadn’t actually bottomed yet but it was always nice to imagine. Chanyeol wasn’t really quite sure when the right time was to ask, _Uh, is it my turn to stick my dick in you yet?_  
  
He handed the tube to Wufan and watched as Wufan slathered his fingers with the liquid, glistening on his skin in the artificial light. The scent of strawberries floated up, and _Oh_ , Chanyeol thought, because Wufan always smelled like strawberries and now Chanyeol knew why. If he were good at dirty talking, he would say something about how hot it was seeing Wufan flexing his gorgeous, long fingers, wet with lube and spit, and dragging them down in a line from his balls to the cleft of his ass. He wasn’t good at dirty talking though because he was Chanyeol and he wasn’t good with words, not unless they were _Fuck_ or _Off_ or _Baekhyun,_ and he didn’t really know how to make, _I think I want you to shove your fist up my ass_ sound sexy.  
  
Wufan eased a slick digit into him and his breath hitched as the tip breached the tight ring of muscles of his hole. The first touch was always awkward, something he had never quite adjusted to so he was grateful for the wait as Wufan stilled his finger and peppered soft kisses up the inside of his thigh. Wufan’s mouth was hot and welcome on his skin, something familiar and tender, and Chanyeol let out a soft _Ah_ at the warmth swooping in his stomach, feeling Wufan’s lips curve into a smile. However, Wufan was getting impatient and pulled it out to the tip and looked up at Chanyeol through his lashes, sweat shining on his forehead, and his eyes dark and blown wide, black, and fuck, that was kind of really hot.  
  
“Can I?” he asked lowly, and Chanyeol nodded because if he had wanted to say no, he would’ve said it two months ago when Wufan had walked in on him jacking off and had pushed him down on his bed and kissed him and wrapped his hand around Chanyeol’s cock. Chanyeol wasn’t going to lie; it had been the best handjob of his life and he didn’t regret it a single bit. Chanyeol never regretted anything he did with Wufan, not when it usually ended up with really great sex, and he definitely didn’t regret Wufan inviting him over for a so called _Disney movie marathon,_ he had said. Well, maybe except for the part where he started crushing on Wufan like a lovesick teenage girl drooling over her favourite hot celebrity. Friends weren’t supposed to like friends as something more, but hey, friends weren’t supposed to fuck each other and jerk each other off so they had crossed that line a long time ago.  
  
Wufan fucked him with a single finger for a while, fucking him shallowly and bordering on that precipice of pleasure but not quite enough to push him over the edge. There was no real technique to his thrusts; there was simply the desire to pleasure Chanyeol as best as he could, and this went on for a while, a familiar sort of vanilla sex, much like their first months of experimenting with each other. Soon, Chanyeol became a moaning, whimpering mess, the sweat from his forehead causing strands of hair to stick to his face and making him look thoroughly debauched. He wasn’t even sure what he was saying now, something like a mix of Korean and awful high school level English and _Fuck_ and _I want more,_ and Wufan was frotting against the mattress, staining the sheets with precome that was going to be a bitch to wash off. If anything, that turned Chanyeol on even more with the tiny gasps and moans escaping from Wufan’s mouth, and the fact that Wufan was enjoying this as much as he was.  
  
“Shh, the dorm walls are kinda thin,” Wufan warned, his voice trembling a bit between pants, and by that he meant stuffing the bunched up sleeve of one of his shirts lying near his bed into Chanyeol’s mouth. “Someone might walk in if you’re too loud.”  
  
It didn't really matter though, not when half the population of Korea knew that they were fucking anyway. And besides, Wufan was way louder than him. _What about you and your whale mating calls?_ he tried to say, but the material muffled his words and he gagged a bit at the taste of the material. Wufan looked immensely pleased with himself.  
  
“That’s better,” he said, and fuck, Wufan was a horrible best friend.  
  
And being the best friend that Chanyeol was fucking meant that Baekhyun was left with the role of the resident cockblocker.  
  
He did it in his own typical Baekhyun way—that loud, obnoxious crunch of Doritos as the door swung open and he casually walked into the room, unperturbed by the sight of his best friend getting fingered by Best Friend’s hot Chinese best friend, and grinned brightly, waving the few crisps in his hand at them.  
  
“Ooh, looks like you guys are having fun,” he said, waggling his eyebrows, and for a second, he looked like he was considering saying something, probably a crude, deprecating joke about Chanyeol’s dick size, before he changed his mind and turned to Wufan. “But sadly, I have better things to do than watch you two have gross vanilla sex. Mind if I use your laptop? I want to use your Netflix account to keep up with the Kardashians.”  
  
Chanyeol squirmed under Baekhyun’s gaze that flicked from Wufan to Wufan’s finger stuffed up his ass as he waited for an answer. Truth be told, he wasn’t exactly comfortable with Baekhyun seeing him like this. Jongin was okay; he had gotten immune to Jongin walking in all the time because Jongin was shameless and he had seen so many dicks in his life that this was nothing new. Baekhyun was a completely different thing though because Baekhyun was…his best friend, had been since third grade, and even though they had seen each other’s dicks too many times to be heterosexual, having Baekhyun here to see someone about to fuck him was something else entirely. Wufan was the best friend that Chanyeol played Mario Kart with and had _Zombie Killer Twinks_ marathons with on the weekends and fucked around with in semi-public places because Wufan was a closet voyeur. Baekhyun was the best friend that Chanyeol had grown up with, that was like his brother, that he did the stupidest shit with like slather Vaseline over Jongin’s eyes when he had been sleeping so he couldn’t open them in the morning, and scrawl _I LOVE COCK_ on Jongin’s forehead in Sharpie pen because that wasn’t really being mean if it was telling the truth. He didn’t like the way Baekhyun looked at Wufan because Baekhyun had never been able to resist hot boys, especially when they were Foreign and Exotic, and Baekhyun was not the best friend who Chanyeol wanted to see his dick like this. That was a privilege saved for Wufan only.  
  
 _Fuck off_ , Chanyeol wanted to grind out but it was hard with material stuffed between his lips, making the inside of his mouth feel all gross and cottony. He reached up to pull it out and wiped the spit away from the edge of his lips and said, “Baekhyun,” which he immediately regretted because he sounded hoarse, like an old chain-smoking man or like he’d just had cock shoved down his throat, but he hadn’t, not today. Not yet, anyway. Baekhyun tried to stifle his guffaws at Chanyeol’s voice, pressing the back of his hand to his mouth, and laughed even harder when Chanyeol’s ears burned in embarrassment and he croaked, “Can’t you see we’re doing something here?”  
  
“Jesus, calm down,” said Baekhyun. “What’s a little voyeurism between friends, right?”  
  
“A little voyeurism is me walking in on you jerking off,” Chanyeol snapped. “This is you being a fucking pervert. Get lost!”  
  
Baekhyun rolled his eyes. “It’s a testament to your heterosexuality how you’re not gay yet,” he quipped, and Chanyeol shot him a glare. If looks could kill, Baekhyun would be six feet underground right now, hanging out with his father in hell, Satan.  
  
“It’s a testament to your horniness how you haven’t fucked off yet, you— _ah!_ ”  
  
Trust Wufan to pull his finger out and thrust them back into right at that moment, tearing a sharp gasp from Chanyeol. He had the smuggest smile on his face, revelling in the sound Chanyeol had made because of him, and shrugged nonchalantly, talking over the sound of Chanyeol’s moans and his palm slapping against Chanyeol’s ass as he fucked his finger in and out of him.  
  
“Sure, Baekhyun,” he said. “Laptop’s over there, charging.”  
  
“Glad to see someone’s not being a huffy bitch. Thanks, Wufan,” Baekhyun replied, navigating through the mess of shirts to the laptop plugged into the wall. Chanyeol couldn’t see him behind Wufan’s body but he heard the start-up sound of the laptop turning on and a double-click as Baekhyun logged into Netflix.  
  
It seemed as though Baekhyun had no intention of getting the fuck out any time soon. Wufan didn’t seem to give two shits, keeping a steady rhythm as he continued to fuck his single digit in and out of Chanyeol and ignoring Chanyeol’s needy pleas of _More more more._ It probably appealed to Wufan’s hidden voyeuristic side, but Chanyeol felt weird knowing that Baekhyun was less than ten metres away and could hear his moans loud and clear over Kim Kardashian’s voice channelling through his earphones. He brought his hand up to his mouth and pressed his knuckles to his lips in an attempt to silence himself, and Wufan glanced up, frowning.  
  
“Why are you so shy, Chanyeol?” he asked, loud enough for Baekhyun to hear. “You weren’t this shy when you were begging for my cock yesterday.”  
  
“Wow, begging for dick? Congratulations, Chanyeol. You’ve reached a new low,” Baekhyun answered, and Chanyeol twisted his head to the side, cracking open an eye to see Baekhyun watching them intently with half a Dorito hanging out of his lopsided smirk.  
  
Baekhyun hadn’t been keeping up with the Kardashians at all. Baekhyun had been watching Wufan finger-fuck Chanyeol for the past couple of minutes, and goddamn, Baekhyun was the biggest pervert on Earth.  
  
“Look how good and ready I’ve gotten him for you,” Wufan said, his voice smooth like melted chocolate and Chanyeol was just really confused. “So hard, for you, Baekhyun.”  
  
Chanyeol didn’t miss the way Baekhyun and Wufan grinned at each other before Baekhyun moved towards them, quickly and efficiently stripping off his clothes, and the whole setup fucking reeked of conspiracy and late night sleepovers. And getting fucked by both of his best friends on his birthday?  
  
He didn’t want to admit it but that was a pretty fucking great birthday present.  
  
“Um,” said Chanyeol as Baekhyun tossed his underwear away and crawled onto the bed beside Chanyeol, cupping Chanyeol’s cheeks in hands, “isn’t this, like, a bit gay?”  
  
“It’s not gay if it’s a threeway,” Baekhyun said helpfully and pressed their lips together in a chaste kiss, muffling Chanyeol’s moan as Wufan let his finger drag against his walls, pulling it out and wiping it clean on his thigh.  
  
It was definitely gay if he liked having fingers and cock shoved up his ass though, Chanyeol thought absentmindedly, and somehow couldn’t quite bring himself to care because it felt like friggin’ heaven.  
  
Wufan moved away from his position between Chanyeol’s legs and mouthed something to Baekhyun, who nodded and moved away with that stupid smirk on his face, and in one sudden movement, Chanyeol felt himself being flipped over, face pushed into the pillow. It took a second to catch his breath, all the oxygen rushing out of his lungs, and then Baekhyun’s hands were on his asscheeks, digging his delicate fingers into the flesh and eliciting a soft groan from Chanyeol from the contrast between Baekhyun’s feminine fingers and Wufan’s strong ones as he rutted against the bed, cock leaking over the sheets.  
  
“I want you to beg,” whispered Baekhyun, words ghosting over the base of Chanyeol’s spine.  
  
“Don’t be too mean. It’s his birthday—“ Wufan started but Chanyeol choked out a quiet, _Please_ that took even himself by surprise because to be honest, all his dignity had flown straight out the window when Wufan had stuffed a five day old T-shirt into his mouth and he would gladly smash his pride into tiny little pieces if it meant that someone would finally fill his ass up with cock or fingers.  
  
“What do you want, Chanyeol?” asked Baekhyun. He ran his fingers along of the cleft of Chanyeol’s ass, teasing touches that barely dipped in, and did this for a while until Chanyeol thought his asscrack felt like a fucking slip ‘n slide. He turned around to peek behind him and Baekhyun was giving him a smirk that was downright salacious. Wufan, on the other hand, was sitting with his back braced against the wall, head tipped back as his chest heaved with each inhalation and exhalations of moans and _Fucks,_ hand pulling at his cock with slow lazy pumps.  
  
Well.  
  
“I’m not going to fuck you until you tell me what you want,” Baekhyun said sweetly, and Chanyeol felt his asscheeks being pried apart by unfamiliar hands. He felt vulnerable like this, with Baekhyun still tracing his finger around the rim of Chanyeol’s hole, slick with lube from where Wufan had fingered him earlier, and spread open for Wufan and Baekhyun to see, but he got some sort of sick satisfaction from being told what to do, from being told to beg, from being completely and utterly helpless and dominated by someone else.  
  
“I’m gonna castrate you if you don’t fucking put your fingers in,” Chanyeol nearly yelled, so turned on without the relief of someone’s touch that he desperately needed that it almost hurt. “Fucking _fuck_ me already, someone.”  
  
“Like this?” Baekhyun asked even as he slid one, two, fingers into Chanyeol, up to the knuckle, and Chanyeol clenched so tightly around him that he couldn’t breathe, let alone answer, and the only thing he could do was moan, squeezing his eyes shut and bringing his hands up to the pillow to pull it towards him to sink his teeth in, muffling his sounds.  
  
Getting fingered by Baekhyun was a huge contrast from getting fingered by Wufan. Wufan fucked him hard and fast, so hard that he could come just from fingers digging into his prostate and his cock trapped between his stomach and his bed, whilst Baekhyun was more about the technique and the tease, slowly wiggling his fingers in and crooking them to find the bundle of nerves inside Chanyeol that made stars explode in his vision. Wufan wanted to get him off; Baekhyun wanted to make him cry, the sadistic bastard.  
  
“You are an awful person,” Chanyeol panted, two fingers curling into his prostate and the flat of Baekhyun’s tongue giving a playful lick to the pucker of his hole to melt his words into moans. “I’m gonna tell your mom that you’re bullying me on my birth— _oh fuck, yes_ —day.”  
  
“Yeah, she would just love to hear about how you’re a total twinky bottom bitch,” Baekhyun said, sliding his fingers out for a moment to drip more lube onto them before fucking them back into Chanyeol with a third, his knuckles making a lewd sound as they connected with the skin of Chanyeol’s ass. “And I think _your_ mom would like to hear about how she’s not gonna have any grandchildren because you’re fucking a hot piece of Chinese ass.”  
  
Chanyeol opened his mouth to protest; all that came out was a weak whimper as Baekhyun’s fingers left his ass and traced the vertebrae of his spine, trailing a sticky line in their wake. Wufan made a noise in the back of his throat and Chanyeol felt him settling behind him again, his wet cock pressing between his asscheeks, the shaft barely sliding over his hole.  
  
“Can we—can we just not talk about moms right this moment because my mom isn’t the person I want to be thinking of when I come,” Wufan said.  
  
“You know nothing of the art of dirty talking, Wufan,” said Baekhyun from somewhere beside Chanyeol, voice accompanied by the sound of his slippery fist working over his dick, and Chanyeol let out a whine of impatience at the incompetence of his two friends when it came to fucking him. It was unfair that they were both having fun and he was just lying there without any stimulation on his cock, touches that he really really needed because he really really needed to _come._  
  
His ears strained to catch an _Okay_ of confirmation as Wufan whispered something to Baekhyun. _What did you say?_ Chanyeol wanted to ask but Wufan pressed his fingers into his skin with a bruising grip and yanked his hips up, thrusting his cock in, and Chanyeol let out a raw hiss of, “Oh bloody fuck.”  
  
He turned to the side, his cheek squished against the pillow, and made those hiccup-y moans he hated, but Wufan had told him he thought were so cute, as Wufan drove his hips into Chanyeol, his cock fucking into him with a steady rhythm that was starting to pick up. Baekhyun was flicking his wrist over his cock in syncopated patterns, face flushing a pretty rose and breathing becoming pants, and the low thrum of arousal hummed in their veins as Wufan fucked Chanyeol and Baekhyun was merely a spectator of the Greatest Porno Ever. His tongue darted out to wet his lips incessantly, teeth catching onto his lower lip, and his gaze constantly alternated between Wufan’s cock pushing past the fluttering rim of Chanyeol’s hole and up to Wufan’s face, waiting for some kind of permission, approval, attention.  
  
“Suck him off,” said Wufan, his voice rumbling in Chanyeol’s bones as he pressed his face against the dip in Chanyeol’s spine and kissed it softly, surprisingly tender considering that currently his cock was skimming against Chanyeol’s prostate and making him squeeze his eyes shut in pleasure.  
  
 _Great,_ Chanyeol thought. He was getting fucked and sucked off at the same time, which was kind of the best present ever, even better than when Baekhyun kegged Jongin in front of the whole school during his dance performance. And anything would be better than the sloppy two second blowjob that was so crap that it didn’t even qualify as a blowjob Wufan had given him half an hour ago, or so he thought, until Baekhyun slipped his fingers underneath his chin and tilted his head up. He opened his eyes to get a face full of cock slapping against his cheek and a grin on Baekhyun’s face that Chanyeol wanted to wipe off with _his_ cock.  
  
“Fucking hell no,” said Chanyeol. “I am _not_ going to blow Baekhyun.”  
  
“Do it,” said Wufan, his voice taking on that commanding tone that made Chanyeol’s cock twitch, and he shut up pretty quickly after that.  
  
Baekhyun snickered as Chanyeol rolled his eyes and opened his mouth obediently to let Baekhyun thrust his cock in, heavy on his tongue. He liked giving head as much as he liked cock stuffed up his ass, maybe even more, because he loved the feeling of being helpless and subject to Baekhyun's every whim. He loved how outside, people thought of him as strong because he was tall and he was friends with Wu Yifan, but in private, he loved how someone could just strip him of that power and control with a single touch, loved how they treated him like a man and not a breakable mannequin. Baekhyun seemed to understand, or maybe he was being a huge asshole, and threaded his fingers through Chanyeol's hair, tugging on fistfuls of brunette strands as leverage to pull himself forward and fuck Chanyeol's mouth carelessly, the blunt head of his cock brushing against the back of his throat.  
  
What he really loved though was how Wufan was fucking him from the back, sporadic thrusts that signalled he was close, and how Baekhyun was fucking him from the front with heavy breaths, eyes closed shut. Wufan snaked his hand around to Chanyeol's front and wrapped his fingers around Chanyeol's dick, the first touch since the Crappiest Blowjob of the Century, and jerked it with quick tugs, making a loose circle with his index finger and thumb for Chanyeol to thrust into. Chanyeol jerked his hips into Wufan's fist and, _oh god,_ it felt amazing, and then backwards, where Wufan's cock pressed ruthlessly into his prostate with every thrust, walls clenching around him. And that was all Chanyeol needed to come, his orgasm hitting him like a tidal wave and making him shudder bodily as he spurted white over his own abdomen. Being able to come, finally, and so hard, made him have a sort of epiphany, that he really kind of did like Wufan, in the more-than-friends way, in the I-want-to-maybe-hold-your-hand-and-cuddle-with-you sort of way, but perhaps confessing with a mouth full of cock wasn't the smartest of ideas.  
  
And he was tired. So tired, and so sleepy, that he barely registered Baekhyun pulling out of his mouth and painting his lips with his come, and Wufan coming inside of him, his come leaking out of his hole as Wufan collapsed onto the bed beside him, sweaty and sated and happy and a little bit drunk.  
  
Best. Birthday. Ever.  
  
(And definitely the most embarrassing.)  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
“So,” said Baekhyun, “you ever gonna tell him?”  
  
“Tell him what?” said Wufan, but his face flushed a soft pink, betraying his nonchalance.  
  
“Oh, _please,_ ” said Baekhyun. “You’re about as subtle as your boner.”  
  
All three of them were squished into Wufan’s bed. It was a tight fit with Baekhyun flattened against the wall and Wufan balancing precariously on the edge of the mattress. Chanyeol had passed out, sandwiched by the two in the middle with an arm flung over Wufan’s torso, and Wufan had been watching him sleep, memorising every inch of his face—the way his eyelashes fluttered over his cheeks and his pink lips were parted slightly as he breathed in and out—until Baekhyun had called him out on it.  
  
“Jesus, if you like his sleeping face so much, I have, like, five hundred photos of him on my phone for blackmailing purposes. I’ll send them to you later. Just—just stop staring at him. It’s weird,” Baekhyun muttered. “But seriously though, are you ever gonna tell him the truth?”  
  
“Yeah,” said Wufan. “I will, probably, one day.”  
  
Baekhyun seemed satisfied with his answer and smiled. “Good. Because it’s getting goddamn annoying watching him pine over you like a lovesick puppy with his godawful shower renditions of love songs and Taylor bloody Swift.”  
  
“There’s nothing wrong with Taylor Swift,” Wufan said indignantly.  
  
Baekhyun looked at him, pursed his lips into a thin line and punched him on the arm.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
“Hey Yeol,” Wufan said, tracing idle patterns onto Chanyeol’s bare stomach where his shirt had hiked up. It was summer, too hot for bedsheets, and too hot for clothes, Wufan had said. Chanyeol had punched him on the arm, blushed, and called him a pervert.  
  
“What,” said Chanyeol. He was irritated that Wufan had interrupted him in the middle of his Temple Run game, making him trip over a tree trunk and lose the game. Nothing had really changed between them in the past two years—Wufan was still a dick, he still really loved Wufan despite that and they still stuck their hands in each other’s pants and jerked each other off every other day.  
  
“Do you remember that time, like, two years ago? When Baekhyun walked in—“  
  
Chanyeol's blood froze.  
  
“NO. NO NO NO NO NO. NO. NO I DON’T. NO,” he hollered, throwing his phone away in favour of plugging his fingers into his ears to block out Wufan’s chuckles. “NO. WHAT TIME. BAEKHYUN. WHO IS BAEKHYUN. I AM. NO. JUST. NO.”  
  
“—and we had the greatest—“  
  
“NO.”  
  
“—sex—“  
  
“NO NO NO.”  
  
“—ever?” Wufan finished.  
  
Chanyeol glared at him. “I hate you,” he said, rolling onto his side to face away from Wufan. He let out an angry puff of air and pulled the pillow over his head, squirming away when Wufan tried to curl an arm around his waist to tug him back.  “I am going to sleep. Goodnight.”  
  
Wufan grinned.  
  
Wu Yifan [23:45]  
He said no. I told you he would say no! I think he’s rather determined to not see your dick again in, like, forever.   
  
byun baekhyun [23:45]  
wow TRY HARDER. i cant believe that after two yrs youre still a complete pushover. when are you two getting married??????????  
  
Wu Yifan [23:46]  
You’re late. Jongin made that joke two years ago. You’re slipping, Byun Baek.  
  
byun baekhyun [23:46]  
yeah my cock is, down your boyfriends ass maybe   
  
Wu Yifan [23:48]  
Bye.  
  
byun baekhyun [23:48]  
no come back im sorry omg i need you   
  
AUTOMATED MESSAGE: USER ‘WU YIFAN’ HAS BLOCKED YOU. [23:48]  
  
byun baekhyun [23:49]  
:(


End file.
